Some critics felt that Ice Cube's willingness to work with Republicans signaled his support for Trump. Quotes, 60 Confidence Quotes to Help You Understand Your Self-Worth, Golfer Tattoos His Dads Advice on His Arm How Those Last Words Help Him Focus, Time Flies: 29 Couples and Families That Mastered the Art of Recreating Old Photos, This Couple Bought and Revamped an Abandoned Laundromat Now Its a Thriving Community Hub With Free Laundry Days, Woman Buys 3-Year-Old a New Bike After She Finds Out His Was Stolen Only Later Does Everyone Find Out Her Real Story. However, Ice Cube has endorsed neither Trump nor his Democratic rival, former Vice President Joe Biden. 8. "Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. I think that speaks for itself. Everyone smiles in the same People are wonderful. The poor are therejust to scare the shit out of the middle class. And term-limits aint going to do you any good. 81. Trying to be happy by accumulating possessions is like trying to satisfy hunger by taping sandwiches all over your body. ~ (George Carlin). 3. Thats the problem. If honesty were suddenly introduced into American life, the whole system would collapse. Feel free to indulge in the philosophy and comedy of George Carlin, expect to be offended at least part of the time. Love, was the kind of person you could hang out with and [], Slim and soft-spoken, endearingly warm and witty, with an enviable knack for captivating the interest of his audiences during his [], How can a sickly boy, suffering from asthma, rickets and rheumatic fever, transform himself into an accomplished gymnast, a wrestler [], With his simple, unpretentious writing style, characterized by an unfiltered, punchy honesty and violent and sexual imagery, Bukowski managed to [], Born in 1910 in Hall, Indiana, John Robert Wooden, aka the Wizard of Westwood, was an American basketball player and [], Short Funny George Carlin Quotes that will make you Laugh, Best George Carlin Quotes to make you Laugh and Think Out of the Box, Insightful George Carlin Quotes on Politics and Government, Inspirational George Carlin Quotes on Life, Society and People, Provocative George Carlin Quotes on Religion that will Remind you there is a Funny Side of God, 80 Woody Allen Quotes About Missing Your Own Funeral and Other Life Stories, 60+ Edgar Allan Poe Quotes to Take You on a Mystery Ride, 51 Elvis Presley Quotes About the Essence of Life and Rock n Roll, 50 Harvey Milk Quotes To Help Us Never Silence Hope, 44 Astonishing Mary Astell Quotes that Spoke of Gender Equality Earlier Than You Think, 50 Unconventional Quotes From Future About Love And Life, 70 Pertinent James Madison Quotes That Can Still Inspire a Better State, 60 Powerful Led Zeppelin Quotes About Love, Life And Death, 65 Exceptional Ruth Bader Ginsburg Quotes About The Fight For Justice, 70 Ariana Grande Quotes That Will Inspire You And Make You Fall In Love, Best 90 George Orwell Quotes on the Danger of Oppression, 75 Jane Austen Quotes on the Truth of Love, The Best Eckhart Tolle Quotes About Now & Being, 70 Karl Marx Quotes to Form Conscience on Social Issues, 60+ Alexander The Great Quotes on the Idea of an Empire, 99 Leonardo Da Vinci Quotes About Knowledge, Art and Inspiration, 50+ Motivational Leo Buscaglia Quotes on Living and Learning, 100+ Yuval Noah Harari Quotes About the World Today, 70+ Joseph Pilates Quotes About the Pilates Method and Your Bodys Potential, 66 Gritty Charles Bukowski Quotes for Restless Souls, 110 John Wooden Quotes to Help You Coach Yourself. ", "Boy, these conservatives are really something, aren't they? Do these people honestly think that God is sitting around picking out his favorites? Two reasons I dont vote: first of all, its meaningless. 36. I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, Wheres the self-help section? She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. 67. WebGovernments don't want a population capable of critical thinking, they want obedient workers, people just smart enough to run the machines and just dumb enough to The real reason that we cant have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse: You cannot post Thou shalt not steal, Thou shalt not commit adultery, and Thou shalt not lie in a building full of lawyers, judges, and politicians. The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American recently passed each other in opposite directions. ~ (George Carlin). Laughuntil you gasp for breath., I have as much authority as the Pope. If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? ~ (George Carlin). That was me when I was fourteen. Current quotes, historic quotes, movie quotes, song lyric quotes, game quotes A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff. ~ (George Carlin). Rough, tough, and hard to bluff." 79. He described himself thus: "Im a rude dude, but Im the real deal. George Carlin on the Church I have as much authority as the Pope. Goalcast is an inspiring community for achievers dedicated to helping you improve all aspects of your life. [3], Carlin was equally hard on politics as he was on religion. Quotes He said: Once you leave the womb, conservatives dont care about you until you reach military age. America, America, man sheds his waste on thee, And hides the pines with billboard signs, from sea to oily sea. ~ (George Carlin). His comedy and social critique will live on through the ages. Save the trees, save the bees, save the whales, save those snails. ~ (George Carlin). everybody complains about politicians. Here, we bring you 27 of the best George Carlin quotes of all time. That's why they call it the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it. 114. The challenge is to find it. ~ (George Carlin). FUCK THEM. We get what we deserve. Everybodys at the mall scratching his ass, picking his nose, taking out his credit card out of a fannie-pack, and buying a pair of sneakers with lights in them. ", Capitalism tries for a delicate balance: It attempts to work things out so that everyone gets just enough stuff to keep them from getting violent and trying to take other peoples stuff., "Bipartisan usually means that a larger-than-usual deception is being carried out. Religion is like a pair of shoes Find one that fits for you, but dont make me wear your shoes. The Christians gave Him Sunday, the Jews gave Him Saturday, and the Muslims gave Him Friday. 1. Heres all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. Bonus Material: Watch this video, it's Carlin at his best! Carlin is a philosopherwho follows logicTo claim he is left or right is obtuse. Test of Metal: Will of Iron, Nerves of Steel, Heart of Gold, Balls of Brass. ~ (George Carlin). 22. Results like these do not belong on the rsum of a Supreme Being. For a man disappointed in all of humanity not sure he wanted to be claimed by either side. If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, youre gonna get selfish, ignorant leaders. This country was founded by slave owners who wanted to be free. 48. "Hmm? Ice Cube visits the "Sway in the Morning" show with Sway Calloway on Shade 45 at SiriusXM Studios on December 07, 2018, in New York City. If you think too much, they'll take you away. If you have selfish ignorant citizens If you have selfish ignorant citizens, youre going to get selfish ignorant leaders. So, have a little fun. 83. 98. So maybe maybe MAYBE, its not the politicians who suck. I have as much authority as the Pope. See more ideas about george carlin, carlin, quotes. You can find out more about our use, change your default settings, and withdraw your consent at any time with effect for the future by visiting Cookies Settings, which can also be found in the footer of the site. Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. 74. I on the other hand, who did not vote, WHO DID NOT VOTE. It creates a hostile work environment. ~ (George Carlin). Dont just teach your children to read. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid. ~ (George Carlin). Web#1 Dont just teach your children to read. Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear themusic. Believe me, my friend. ~ (George Carlin). ", "In America, anyone can become president. 42. 106. I dont have to tell you it goes without saying there are some things better left unsaid. Jesus, Gandhi, Lincoln, John Kennedy, Bobby Kennedy, Martin Luther King, Medgar Evers, Malcolm X, John Lennon, they all said, "Try to live together peacefully." A good motto to live by: Always try not to get killed. If your kid needs a role model and you aint it, youre both f***ed. 27 George Carlin Quotes For Freethinkers and Rebels, Skip our thoughts on George Carlin and jump straight to the quotes, 26 Voltaire Quotes Everyone Should Read Today, Bipartisan Bill Would Ban Children Under 13 From Using Social Media, Anti-Gun Yard Signs Are an Invitation To Criminals. Religion. Theres only the immediate future and the recent past. ~ (George Carlin). We are a nation of sheep, and someone else owns the grass. What if there were no hypothetical questions? ~ (George Carlin). 88. 30. If someone understands, good. And they will readily admit to being awkward: Im such a klutz! But they will never admit to having a poor sense of humor or being a bad driver. ~ (George Carlin). 90. Scratch any cynic and you will find a disappointed idealist. ~ (George Carlin). Political correctness is America's newest form of intolerance, and it is especially pernicious because it comes disguised as tolerance. It will be Nike sneakers and Smiley shirts. Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. When fascism comes to America, it will not be in brown and black shirts. Cocked, locked, and ready-to-rock. Somebodys wasting their fucking time. But once you're born, you're on your own. Carlin didnt hesitate to criticize presidents by name Bill Clinton and George W. Bush among them but, more often, he spoke in broader terms and They brought a new era to the world [], An outstanding jurist and the second woman ever appointed to the U.S. Supreme Court, Ruth Bader Ginsburg trail blazed through [], When trying to write about Ariana Grande, one word comes directly to the mind and sums up everything: phenomenon. Here, we bring you 27 of the best George Carlin quotes of all time. However, he calls himself an apatheist (meaning that he's an atheist who doesn't care about the topic). Thats why they call it the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it. Everybody says they suck. Tell people theres an invisible man in the sky who created the universe, and the vast majority will believe you. The status quo sucks. ~ (George Carlin). We and our partners use cookies to Store and/or access information on a device. I'm not sure silencing people or forcing them to alter their speech is the best method for solving problems that go much deeper than speech. "Edmund, you're talking to yourself." They don't like him because the media and the academic elite have brainwashed them to the point where they cannot think beyond liberal orthodoxy.Carlin remarked that it was a terrible shame that liberals were leading the war against free speech. It will not be with jack-boots. Some people see the glass half full. If you would like to change your settings or withdraw consent at any time, the link to do so is in our privacy policy accessible from our home page.. Web421 quotes from George Carlin: 'The reason I talk to myself is because Im the only one whose answers I accept. The Kennedy Center posthumously awarded this year's Mark Twain Prize for American Humor to George Carlin. ", When we think of dictators, we think about other countries. Im completely in favour of the separation of Church and State. Pro-life conservatives are obsessed with the fetus from conception to nine months. ", "I'm pretty sick of church people. Tweet. The planet isnt going anywhere. Some people have to go to work and dont have time for all that. ~ (George Carlin). Lean and mean! They come from American parents, and American families, American homes, American schools, American churches, American businesses, and American universities. This explains that although teamwork is important, what you can individually bring to a business is equally relevant. If no one knows when a person is going to die, how can we say he died prematurely? ", "There are 200 countries in the world now. Thats the problem. ~ (George Carlin). The more we pointed out the foolishness of our "superiors," the more they kept us down. I don't trust none of them. Ironic that political wings have come to fight over claiming Carlins humor for their own affiliations when his comedy career was a controversial compilation of his own bold assessments and ruthless truths that could offend anyone and everyone on a given topic with neither prejudice nor remorse. Im not sure silencing people or forcing them to alter their speech is the best method for solving problems that go much deeper than speech. ", "Catholics and other Christians are against abortions and they're against homosexuality. Instead of division let's have a laugh about what we share in common. And the main reason women are crazy is that We invite you and ask you to help us update this wiki by editing it. George Carlin, in full George Denis Patrick Carlin, (born May 12, 1937, New York, N.Y., U.S.died June 22, 2008, Santa Monica, Calif.), American comedian whose Seven Words You Can Never Say on Television routine led to a U.S. Supreme Court ruling that gave the Federal Communications Commission (FCC) the right to determine when to As for me, Ill be home on that day, doing essentially the same thing as you, the only difference is, when I get finished masturbating, Im going to have a little something to show for it folks. Craziest Republican Quotes of the 21st Century, Best Anti-Gun Jokes and One-Liners About Gun Control, Funny Arnold Schwarzenegger Quotes as Actor and Politician. George Carlin 11. If youre born in America you get a front row seat. ~ (George Carlin). Follow the link for the full transcript, its worth it, but here are a few choice excerpts: When it comes to bullshit, big-time, major league bullshit, you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims, religion. I have as much authority as the Pope. But first thing the next morning, I became a sun-worshipper. Tell people there's an invisible man in the sky who created the universe, and the vast majority will believe you. Im fu*kin serious! ~ (George Carlin). 125 George Carlin Quotes 1. Governments dont want a population capable of critical thinking, they want obedient workers, people just smart enough to run the machines and just dumb enough to passively accept their situation. ~ (George Carlin). Think of how stupid the average person is, and then realize that half of them are stupider than that. WebHere are some of our favorite George Carlin quotes on politics. 15. Deal with it. ~ (George Carlin). Thats the problem. 92. Life is not measured by the breathes you take, but by the moments that take your breath away. The reason I talk to myself is because Im the only one whose answers I accept. Lee did not involve himself formally in politics, but he was a symbol of diversity and the synthesis of "East" and "West." The future will soon be a thing of the past. ~ (George Carlin). The real owners, the big wealthy business interests that control things and make all the important decisions.And, now, they're coming for your Social Security. First Words (@unscriptedmike) May 18, 2022, George Carlin said "When fascism comes to America, it will not be in brown and black shirts. People always tell me Have a nice day. Well what if I dont want to? Have you ever wondered why Republicans are so interested in encouraging people to volunteer in their communities? 66. I see a glass thats twice as big as it needs to be. The shit they shuffle around every four years doesnt mean a fuckin thing. 102. The legendary George Carlin reminded us to think deeply but to make sure we take time to laugh and never take ourselves too seriously. 105. A few laughs with George Carlin. Fucking is legal. The following statement is true. 62. Read these short quotes by the renowned comedian to make you smile while seeing things from a different perspective. An idle mind is the devils workshop. And the devils name is Alzheimers. ~ (George Carlin). George Carlin had a lot to say, and we were always ready to listen. Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity. If you vote and you elect dishonest, incompetent people into office who screw everything up, you are responsible for what they have done. Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. ', and 'Here's all you Just a friendly reminder that George Carlin would despise and verbally disembowel the vast majority of pundits, public figures, and random idiots currently heaping praise on him because it's trendy. Manage Settings And they own all the big media companies, so that they control just about all of the news and information you hear. WebNov 15, 2014 - Explore Boopsie's board "George Carlin:::Political quotes:::::" on Pinterest. It was hard to lump Carlin into any political demographic. If honesty were suddenly introduced into American life, the whole system would collapse. ~ (George Carlin). 119. The word bipartisan usually means some larger-than-usual deception is being carried out. Im sure as soon as the election is over, your country will improve immediately. They're all in favor of the unborn. Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. 17. No contest. ", "Here's all you need to know about men and women. Cookies collect information about your preferences and your devices and are used to make the site work as you expect it to, to understand how you interact with the site, and to show advertisements that are targeted to your interests. 107. You have owners. Fortunately, fans of Carlin are not easily persuaded that everything must align with partisan preference. ", "If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, you're going to haveselfish, ignorant leaders. 80. If God created everything, hes got a serious quality control problem. ~ (George Carlin). We dont have people like that in this country. Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. TIME takes a look at some of the legendary comedian's most memorable lines. You have no choice. This is what we have to offer. Well, we know what they want: They want more for themselves and less for everybody else.". This is the best we can do folks. Teach them to question everything. Report 48 points POST Looking at you religion. He and if there is a God, I am convinced he is a he, because no woman could or would ever f*** things up this badly. And term-limits aint going to do you any good. 89. Because if its really just the fault of these politicians, then where are all the other bright people of conscience? Enjoy! Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. ~ (George Carlin). It is easy to speculate that George Carlin would have been disgusted by the thought of being a political darling for any party, and especially by the thought of being partisan media clickbait. If they come back, set them on fire. ~ (George Carlin). The only good thing ever to come out of religion was. "Think about how stupid the average person is, and then realize that half of 'em are stupider than that. Teach them to question everything. 3. We are a nation of sheep, and someone else owns the grass. ~ (George Carlin). 115. This is the kind of shit youd expect from an office temp with a bad attitude. It will not be with jack-boots. If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation? ~ (George Carlin). I just dont have as many people who believe it. ~ (George Carlin). Everyone experiences pain, of course. Some people have no idea what theyre doing, and a lot of them are really good at it. ~ (George Carlin). 27 George Carlin Quotes For Freethinkers and Rebels by Libertarian Country. Webwelcome to another episode of George Carlin quotes what George Carlin Quotes, What I Think About Politics. Im happy to tell you there is very little in this world that I believe in. You caused the problem; you voted them in; you have no right to complain. ~ (George Carlin). Religion is like drugs, it destroys the thinking mind. ~ (George Carlin). Fascism won it. "I have certain rules I live by. Maybe its because he heard we have 18 delicious flavors of Classic Rice-A-Roni! 111. We think in words. Teach them to question everything. 72. I think its the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately. ~ (George Carlin). Something is definitely wrong. Some people see the glass half full. 59. People who see life as anything more than pure entertainment are missing the point. ~ (George Carlin). They will do anything for the unborn. Something is wrong here. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid. And armbands. There are three kinds of people: those who can count, and those who cannot. ~ (George Carlin). The owners of this country know the truth: Its called the American dream because you have to be asleep to believe it. Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? ~ (George Carlin). The middle class pays all of the taxes, does all of the work. It's important in life if you don't give a shit. For Exclusive Deals, New Product Alerts, Free Articles, Libertarian News & More! 122. Here is a selection of Carlins quotes that criticize the political system of our days. Swimming is a way to keep from drowning. Atheism is a non-prophet organization. ~ (George Carlin). 35. 2. In America, anyone can become president. It's our undeniably superior (almost god-like) intelligence that made life difficult for us when we were children. 71. There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls. ~ (George Carlin). 26. Copyright 2017 iComedyTV.com. We havent tried that for a while. If this is the best God can do, I am not impressed. Republicans have been trying to get people to work for no pay for a long time.
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